So this got me thinking...

A lot of the little things in life make me happy. Silly little things that not everyone notices, like when you get the crackers with burnt edges. When I catch my foot right before stepping on a snail. The smell right before it rains. Sometimes when I pick the right key the first time to lock my door. Just enough juice left to get one cup. How the stars look at night, even with all this light pollution. How cute Ellen Page and Michael Cera are in Juno. Ladybugs. When it's really foggy in the morning and you can't see. How good cracked paint looks. Old shows like professor iris and read all about it. Funny words like race car. How tasty pumpkin pie is.

But mostly, the way the sun looks so happy after a thunderstorm.

First Snow

So I just walked outside to find the present of life. It's snowing. And my reaction was that of a two year old who didn't know what this was but thought it was a magical sign from some mystical place. Okay, maybe I took it a little out of proportion but I don't care.

I love love love the first snow fall. I've come to realize it just reminds me when I was younger and snow was so amazing. I'd be sitting in class and there would be the one kid that would scream "It's Snowing!" and everyone would rush the windows of the class room to see it snow. I miss these simple times and I like to take these moments as I get older to sit back and remember. I love snow because to me, it means way more then having to shovel, and salt, and the flu. It means, Friends, Family, Scarfs, Hot Chocolate, Sitting on front porches for hours, all the tiny little things that seem so insignificant but really mean a lot when you think about it. I just love snow.

Bum-bum-buhhh.

I have a lot to complain about. So much it usually consumes most of my thoughts, and lately I've just come to realize I should be a lot happier with what I have. I have a family, as scattered as it is, that loves me to the worlds end, friends who I wouldn't trade for anything, and I'm surrounded by positive people.

High school was an interesting time for me. I wasn't the "cool" kid or anything close. I came into grade nine as a new kid and knew no one. I was a lost little puppy and much like a deer in headlights. I was so scared of being hurt, or showing I was hurt I just put a wall up. I just always as second nature had this wall up and I don't know why. I need to start doing things without thinking. I need to fall flat on my face and realize what is wrong.

I've come really far from where I used to be, but more and more I want to be the polar opposite.